You are welcome here....

I started off thinking I was going to do a weight loss blog. That was too one dimensional for me - but I absolutely love some of the ones I follow! This is a typical, broad spectrum, anything goes hybrid of diary and therapy for me. You are welcome here.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

down 82 Pounds!

I survived the holidays with slower weight loss.....but it's a loss! 

Yay me!

Saturday, December 8, 2012

So Sorry!!

Not sure how many people actually come here to read...but if you are one, I am so sorry I haven't kept up with it more!  I know I am sad when I go to a blog I like only to see it hasn't been updated in FOREVER :(

I post a lot on the vertical sleeve talk forum, but this is mine, and I should do better....

I just passed my 5 month surgiversary...and weigh 218 as of this morning.  I wear a 14/16 and I believe that is like 74 pounds down from July 2nd!   I love it.

I haven't puked once, been in pain, or had any major problems.  The worse thing has been my hair thinning out, but I had a lot to start with and I know it will thicken out again with time. 

I love this surgery.

If you are thinking about it - go for it.  It is the best thing I have ever done for myself.

Saturday, July 28, 2012

NSV - Non-surgical victory!

I am not even a full month out (surgery was July 2nd) and I am down like 23 pounds from day of surgery.  My clothes are fitting loose and I have soooo much more energy.  I am already noticing my confidence returning...and my adventurous nature!   The other day, I DIVED off a diving board - 3 times!  My children have NEVER sen me do this!  They loved it - and so did I!!!   Also - we went to the movies, and my butt fit in the chair!  My husband - who is 100% supportive and never made me feel less than sexy - is astounded!  He is gone 2 weeks at a time - so he sees bigger changes than I do in the day to day functioning.......

I am excited...I haven't lost much in the last week and a half, but I have faith.  Food is not controlling my life, yet I enjoy SMALL portions of really good food that is good for me!  I am hitting 60g of protein a day - thank God I love fish!!

Thursday, July 19, 2012

17 days post surgery

Went to the Dr. today - I have lost 20 pounds so far and dropped my BMI 5%.  He says I am doing fantastic, my incisions are completely healed and I have permission to submerge!  Here I come Beach, pool and's just not a summer in Texas without floating down the river a few times!! 

My concerns were this:

1.) I haven't lost any weight at ALL in 4 days.  He says to put away my scale, I say no way!  He said hide it, I said I am sorry, but no!

2.) My heart felt like it was thudding out of my chest the other night - very strange.  It was like every 4th or 5th beat, it would pound hard.  It isn't doing it now, and no pain - he says sometimes your esophagus can spasm...but I said there was no pain...he said strange, let  me know if it happens again.   He also asked about my fluid intake - I am good, and drink 24 oz of G2 gatorade to keep my electrolytes we shall see....

3.) My muscles are achy - like I worked out hard.  Stiffer in the mornings, better as the day goes...but still sore.  I have been BUSY - lots of running around, errands, kid stuff, but no "working out".  He said very rarely, the anesthesia they use, particularly the stuff that paralyzes your muscles, takes a LONG time to get out of your system.  This could explain why I pretty much had NO pain after surgery and could sleep in my bed as soon as I came home with no discomfort or pain meds....I pay for it now :(   Anyway, he says it should subside.....

That was about it.  Still no lifting - can go walking or do cardio.  No tough meats or veggies until 6 weeks out - no problem, loving my fish!!  I told him his shakes blow, and that I will be thrilled to never HAVE to drink a meal again!  Of course - I do have some Muscle Milk in the fridge for when I HAVE to grab something on the way out the door.  I am really trying to hit my 60-70g of protein a day.  I don't want to be a flabby bag of skin!! 

My back bothers me - but  when I asked about a chiropractor, he said NO!  I didn't need to be twisted and contorted yet (I have never been to one).  He said to treat myself to a massage - and that it would be better and cheaper!  I will have to tell hubby this ;)

ANyway - feeling great fatigue, in a good mood.   Looking forward to more pounds dropping......

Saturday, July 14, 2012

It is done.

SO - pneumonia derailed original surgery date and plans.  God keeps working on me with the whole "I am a planner" attitude!  Date was moved to July 2nd, I was terrified, went in at 292 and here I am now 12 days later at 274.  I am drinking my water and soooo ready for the "soft" foods....give me a fish filet or give me death!! :)  I kid, I kid.....The full liquid stage is terrible - really!

Surgery wasn't horrible.  My nerves were!!  I woke up afterwards nauseous! That lasted most of the day, but by evening I was okay.  I was up and walking and peeing a few hours after getting back to my room.  This surgery didn't seem to be as painful as the laprascopic hysterectomy I had a few years ago.....
The next day - the liquid they made me drink for the leak test started the nausea all over again - and it lasted all day!  I got to go home that evening, and I have been fine since.  No pain meds and sleeping in my bed with no problems. 

It is HARD to get all the liquid in they want you too....too much and you feel uncomfortable!!!

More later!!!!

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

I got a date....

June 5th.  That is the day I will permanently change my life and my battle with my weight.  I will be having a vertical gastric sleeve performed by Dr. McDaniel in Victoria,TX.  I start my meal replacement shakes on May 23rd (2 shakes a day and one protein with veggie dinner) to reduce the fat around my liver.  I have appointments on May 29th to have my liver and gall bladder ultrasound and blood work and my last visit with my Doctor (the pre-op appointment) on May 31st.  Then I am going camping with my family for the weekend, going to small claims court over a STUPID issue that I hope is resolved quickly (we filed the suit, just irritates me it had to come to this) - then check in to the hospital on June 5th at 5:00 in the morning.  I will stay one night, to a leak test the next day - and come home to recover.

I am nervous.  I have been jumping through the hoops and considering this since September.  I have joined the Vertical Sleeve Talk Forum and have talked with numerous individuals in both pre op and post op situations.  I have read, and practiced chewing 30 times, and tried sipping water and not drinking with meals.....and I am still scared.  I am removing 80% of a healthy organ that has only done it's job all too well.

This is not a quick fix - and I really don't give a damn about people who think that.  I have shared my decision with my friends, family and even co-workers and have found nothing but support.  I am doing this for me - and for my children.  I would love to say vanity has nothing to do with it - but that would be a lie.  WHile my primary purpose is health and the ability to keep up and DO with my kiddos, I can't deny the joy I get when I think about shopping in any store I would like...not just the big girl stores.  I am nervous about loose skin....because ya know, puffy fat rolls look so much more attractive!  I know it will be work - and I just want to get through the liquid phase, the tired and no energy phase as quickly as possible and just eat to live instead of living to eat.  I am ready.  Sorry Ms. Gallon stomach - you gotta go.

I am ready to post befpre and after pics - and pics all in between -
I struggle to find very many of me - I am hiding behind stuff or behind the out world. I am coming....

And watch out roller coaster and rides I have avoided.  ANd horse back riding.  ANd flying somewhere with asking for a seat belt extender......

I am ready....

Consider these my before :)  I am ready...I am ready...I am ready....I am ready....I am ready.....I am!

Thursday, April 19, 2012

The day is coming.....

I have now completed the 6 month medically supervised diet...I lost about 10 pounds somewhere in there, but had gained it back by the last weigh in. Basically, you pay for an office visit and they weigh you, ask if you are following an 1800 calorie diet and getting exercise....Suuuuurrrreee I am ....

Anyway - all papers are at the bariatric center now, and I am just waiting for official approval from insurance. Could take a few weeks, but I am not in a huge rush. I am hoping to have surgery the 3rd week of June or so....I am actually getting a little excited at the prospect of ending this small, nagging, sense of self loathing when it comes to the size of my arse. I remain pretty confident about myself, and I do have fears of looking like a melted candle stick....but I think it will all be ok.

I think the only thing I have left is an ultrasound on my gallbladder and a pre-op visit with the surgeon....then I will be all done. Except for the whole cutting out my stomach and existing on liquids for a month post op!

Oh - and let's not forget they ask you to replace 2 meals with shakes and eat a protein and veggie dinner for 2 weeks before the surgery - sounds like fun times! I am sure that will not be too hard as I know it shrinks your liver and makes for a safer surgery.

So that is where I am at now.....I look forward to my own before and after gallery. God knows I enjoy perusing them on the internet.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Waning Woman: Contact Me!

Waning Woman: Contact Me!: You can reach me via Facebook , Twitter , or on my email, waningwoman at I am fluent in smoke signal interpretation, too.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

95% and counting.....

I am in month 4 of my "medically supervised diet" required by my insurance to have weight loss surgery. Only other requirement is an ultrasound of my gall bladder as I get closer to the date I pick for surgery. If it looks susceptible to gall stones, they will remove it at the same time as the surgery as gall stones plague weight loss surgery patients.
Of the Supervised is a joke. My family doctor is awesome - like her a lot....but all she does is recommend a 1500 calorie diet and exercise...duh!! If I could stick to that I would! On the brighter side, I signed up for the biggest loser competition at my school and they put us in teams....THAT makes for some accountability and I lost 5 pounds in the first is 8 weeks long so it coincides with the end of the "supervised" one - so maybe I won't hang my head in shame as I step on the scale at the end of this month. Of course, I have lost 1,000 pounds - the same 20-30 over and over! I even lost 50 once on the Atkin's...only to get pregnant and gain it all back, plus some.

SO - I am 95% sure I am going to have this surgery in June....3rd or 4th week of June. Then I will have the rest of the summer to normalize to my new eating. I weighed the timing heavily...and am still worried about depriving my children of fun filled summer days - but I have an excellent support system. I even shared with my other teacher's on my team that I was thinking about it, and they were super supportive, and one of them even shared that her best friend was having the surgery over spring break. Geesh - the stigma and fear of putting that info out there was bothering me more than I thought. It's not like they haven't seen the size of my arse going doing down the halls every day!! :)

SO I am trucking on, lots going on in my daily life. Finishing up Dave Ramsey's 13 week Financial Peace University this coming Tuesday with my has had some rough patches, but overall has really changed how we view our money. It has been a huge blessing to our family.

I am not smoking (fell off the wagon for a few days with Hubby's 40th birthday bash), but feel really good about that! Am trying to really spend quality time with family members - even gave my Dad a birthday card filled with activities for us to do together instead of the traditional Amazon gift card.

All is well in my life, looking forward to changes in my body......